Short-term [Memory] Loss

“Life’s too short to be anything but happy.”  – I really, really dislike that saying. I always have. It makes me cringe.  Not because it’s not true, because it is, but because of the way people manipulate the meaning to justify their behavior. I think what people are hoping to accomplish from that quote is joy. Joy is a state of mind, not circumstances.

Short-term [memory] loss has become a cultural issue. No, I’m not talking about the medical meaning of short-term memory loss.  I’m talking about short-term [memory] happiness.  Short-term peace.  Short-term promises.  I am talking about countless behaviors that lead us to spinning our wheels over and over again; even when it wears the mask of a different topic.

Are we flat out idle these days? Has our culture completely broken down to utter superficial and immediate gratification? Don’t like your boss? Great, get a new job. Is that relationship taking work or is the “honeymoon” phase over? No big deal, get a new boyfriend. (Which may I add; you will run into issues with him or her too…you just haven’t seen their dirty laundry yet.)

When people don’t get what they want, they give up or give in. This is exactly why we shouldn’t give participation awards to kids. “Nice try, you didn’t win, but here is a prize anyway! Next!”

KIDDING – sort of.

How can we change the mold of this new reality? Here is one of my ideas. I would love to hear yours.

  • Decide what you want for your life. Break it into chunks and then dig in.  For example; I want to have a healthy marriage. I desire to become a dedicated and loving mother. I want to have a career, not just a job.  I want to have a deep relationship with God. I want to go to heaven and help as many people as I can get there too.

Now how do I accomplish those life goals without throwing in the towel when it gets hard (because it will) ? Here is an abbreviated example:

  • Marriage Plan: Work daily to become a loving wife.  Dedicate time to my husband and any mentors who will provide guidance along the way.  Surround myself with like-minded friends; people who will hold me (and my husband) accountable when we begin demonstrating behaviors that would indicate we may simply be hoping to achieve the “participation award” instead of actually succeeding/growing.  Stay invested into the Word. Set boundaries to protect our marriage. No one is immune. Don’t get lazy.  The list goes on and on.

Give it a try…

Listen, we can’t keep letting this world dictate our behavior. We can’t act aimlessly, expecting to suddenly become fulfilled.  If we say we believe in something, we have to live a life that demonstrates that, regardless of the popular opinion.  This means we can’t always shift our focus/goals every time something becomes difficult or a shiny new object crosses our path.  Be self aware friends! We live in a visible world.  Social media has intruded our headspace, peace and boundaries . Comparison is the thief of joy.  Don’t let comparison win.  Don’t cave just because your friend’s success looks different than yours.  If it takes writing down what you want in life, do that. And stick with it; adjusting where you need to, not where you want to. If you need to get off social media, do that.  If you need to let go of some toxic friendships, well sadly, you may have to be okay with that.

So what do you want most in this life? Do that. Chase the life Jesus has intended for you with intention and dedication!



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A 33 year old Nashville female who loves Jesus and looks at life for what it is; messy and beautiful. After writing for Christian magazines and nonprofit blogs, Balanced Chaos came to life when she realized the world needed a raw dose of reality.

3 thoughts on “Short-term [Memory] Loss

  1. I love this particular piece so much! As a mom of two boys, ages 12 and 9, I worry about the instant gratification world they’re growing up in, because of technology, exacerbated by the participation trophy culture in which they live. Your blog is so right on point and I will think of it as I lecture my boys (almost daily about) hard work and true growth occurring in the fight/struggle/valleys of their lives… not in the good times. Their perspective on the events that occur IS under their control- just like marriage. If more of us took our spouses to be by our sides “for worse” I think divorce rates would be cut substantially! Anyone can do the “for better” part 😉 Have a great day- I look forward to reading more of your thoughts! God bless!!


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